:)

Today had dinner with my family @Carlton Hotel to celebrate my 'ah-ma's' birthday. Man... Just miss my family. It's been a loooong long while since i went out dinner with them. Hmmm... Time to do something about it. *hint dear*

God, though at times I just can't comprehend why You place me in such a family but one thing I do know... Your plans are simply the BEST!

failed! so what?

Failed my driving test on friday. Was really upset at first until God sent Zec to spoke sense into me.

I guess a perfectionist just want things perfect. No scars, no failures etc. But by being a perfectionist, i guess it'll slowly link you up to being prideful 'cause you want 'The Best' for everytthing and everyone around you will think you are good in some sense and hence you will think that you are good. But God is knocking 'HUMILTY' into my life. Something I always wanted but it just cannot co-exist with the perfectionist. One has to go. My guess is the perfectionist. Haha...

I thank God that during the driving test, I had a fantastic examiner. Just too bad I could not keep my cool after making a grievous mistake-mounting kerb. After that mistake, that examiner still looked as if he wanted to pass me. So I thought to myself that I'll continue to do my best. However, after awhile, I looked down at the result slip, a big ugly X was marked on the mounting kerb circle. I lost it all. I drove recklessly. And that cost me my license 'cause Sam Wong was telling me on Sat that his friend mounted kerb but still passed.

I guess this also teach me another lesson. When trials come our way, what's our response like? To turn nasty and hostile towards it(and God) or be bold and overcome it (with God).............

19 months and more to go....

We are 19 months together already. Not exactly. But 18 months and 30 days and 21hrs. Aiya.. Whatever. You get the point.

As i recall back. It's like HOW undeserving. Zec was just Brother Zec. A far away figure which whom campers look up to. A crazy game master. A not too bad looking leader in SU camp. How can he fall for a plain jane=simple sharon like me? Nothing can explain this but the GRACE of God I guess. Zec fits in all the criterias I wanted for a husband-to-be. Godly, God-loving, God-fearing, loving, understanding, patient..... Even small little secret desires for a husband-to-be which is not prayed aloud were answered-must not be the eldest or only son (v stress 'cause must give birth to boys). How wonderful is our Father that gives good gifts to His children?

Well.. But thru this 1year plus journey, I would say the journey is tough. But by His grace and strength. This journey is getting ROUGHER. We are hanging onto our Anchor-Jesus Christ. Right, Dear?

Let it RAIN!!

Just wanna thank God for something that He has been showing me. His goodness and faithfulness.

For 3 occasions-once last week, yesterday and today. He held back the rain EACH time till I reach my block/'safety'. You may say that it's coincidental but yesterday was simply AMAZING! He held back the rain from 10am till about 430pm. It's like I had driving from 1030-1210 then I had to go school from 2-3+pm. Finally, when i arrived at Zec's place at 4+pm, it has already finished raining at his area. But the sky was SUPER dark the whole day. God held back the rain the past few times and I didn't have to go back drenched. Hee... Praise the LORD!

Isn't He wonderful

Wonderful, isn't He

King of kings

Lord of lords.......

Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for He who promised is faithful.

Hebrews 10:23

COMPLEX-city

Have you ever realise that as one grows older, one seldom shares like how they used to as a youth or kid? We used to share anything and everything under the sun. When one's older, we'll think: "How will others think about me if I share this thing that I'm struggling with?", "I don't wanna look weak in front of others." etc. etc.

Why do we get so complex when we grow up?? Why can't we maintain our childlike-ness, innocence???

At times, as we live, just so sick of this life. People around are just so untrue. We are all masked up.

Unless we peel off each layer of mask. We'll never know and can never know each other. Friends will just be superficial friends no matter how 'close' we may seem to be.

Lord, try me, search me to be true. To be set aside for You. Even though at times by sharing, I may appear vulnerable to others. But does it matter? Teach me too to be patient with people. Though they may not want to share, teach me to wait. To build trust takes time. But I guess I got to make that first step too. But most importantly, teach me to come before You with ALL I am, JUST AS I am. In Christ's name, Amen

F.O.C.U.S

Focus is the message God has been telling me again and again this whole week. Well.... Probably is because how un-focus I have been all these while. Coming out from my ex-church have been a change which I have been coping till these days. Probably...... It's time to FOCUS!

Focus On Christ and not on past achievements. Focus on Christ and not on what He have given to others. Focus on Christ... Focus on Christ....

I guess... When you are out of your comfort zone, you are just insecure. You don't have a clear vision of the future ahead. You are just left with the Spirit's constant prompting that it's time to move on. Unsure, you just want to be obedient and hence, move on. Subsequently, God brought you someone to lead you into another land. There, you are SO unfamiliar with the land. Instead of thanking God for safety landing, you question Him, what now, what now? You look around and shrink into a small ball when inhabitants of the land walk past you (unlike the past, you walk around and greet others with a big smile, asking how's their day like?). In your mind, you are not mad with God, just WHY God? Why do You lead me out? After training me up in so many aspects, You just lead me out and start from scratch?? I REALLY don't understand, God. But I know Your plans are the best (Jeremiah 29:11). In You, I trust.

In this new land, you just look around. You can't help but ask, "God, everyone's thriving in You and Your ministry. What about me?" However, He answer-wait. I'll call you. True enough.. He calls after a wait which seem like eternity.

Till now, many a times, (I guess it's a bad habit from school-esp around exam period) I peek around looking at the many wonderful things God has given to others and get upset with God. HOWEVER, I FAIL to see. The things He have placed in front of me. Just like Martha, I got to learn. FOCUS! No point getting upset. The gift is just in front. Seized it instead of complaining and getting upset over something that is already there for us (but we just keep thinking it's just meant for others.) FOCUS!

Focusing On Christ, Understanding Spirit

that's what we gotta do. Otherwise we'll just miss

out LOADS in His plans and the gifts He has bestow to you.

Penguin-let

It's cute right????

Blessed Birthday!!!

It's Zec's bday.. Serangoon cell sorta celebrated for him yesterday 'cause we had Alpha training with them and they celebrated the Sept babies.

Today our cell organised a SURPRISE party for him. THANKS cell! ALL of you were great!! Great actors and actresses. Special thanks to Cheryl, Christine, Aunt Cecilia, Uncle Nat and Sam Wong-my 'committee' people. Also thanks to Shawn and Szela for joining us (hope to see you all on next sat! ;) ). Man.. Am amazed that Zec didn't even suspected anything. I'm a TERRIBLE liar. And most of the time he can see 'thru me. But........ It succeeded! We're good people. It was flawless (abt 99.9% la-must be humble.. haha...). For Zec the sabo-er to not discover such stuff.... We must be good, cell! Haha... Keep it ip!! :P

Really thank God for forming and allowing Zec to come onto Earth 24 years ago... Thank God for sending me The One which is so perfect! Not perfect as in Jesus' perfection but perfect for my world created by Him. Thank God for sending me a loving, understanding, patient.... patient... and MORE patient.... guy.. Haha... One that compliments me in almost every way..... Aaaaaah... Father.. You know best. I love You Father.

I love you dear. Blessed Birthday!

PUuuuuurFECT

What is so great about getting things perfect? It's like absolute arguments(whether right or wrong)! Once you find a flaw to it, that's it! It no longer stands. Just like once there's a mistake. Poof! No longer perfect!

Man.. Was so super frustrated this morning. Just because i was rushing out, cant put the cute penguin pictures up. It's not that i cant. I actually uploaded those pictures. But by one click of a button, pictures disappear. When i cant get things done the way i should, from a sweet smiling face to a sour and bitter face. It's really that bad.

This is not the first time. Asked Zec whether I am a perfectionist, he say I am. From the way I do things, wanting everything perfect and in place tells you more than mere words written here. What's worse? I want things MY way almost all the time (thinking that it's the most flawless piece of work). Yupz.. That's what I am. Wanna change! Or maybe.. It's part of me. Hmmmmmmm.........

Lord,

Teach me to see things the way You see.

Mistakes may help us learn-may be the key.

They are not as bad as it is,

I just got to learn to see it from a different perspective.

Teach me to be humble and true.

To all mankind as well as to You.

Teachability is also what i need.

All the above are just seeds...

Seeds to succeed...

As Your daughter, princess and warrior.

Amen

Maybe.. Perfectionist is one of the greatest imperfection.

Penguins......

Watched a penguin movie on Mon with my 3 pretty cousins, aunt and uncle... Well.. If you're thinking of watching it(i doubt), don't man. Waste of money. It's just a documentary (which can be found on National Geographic or Animal Planet) with CHINESE translation. Well.. I didn't mind.. 'Cause my aunt paid for it... Haha...

O... Baby penguins are SOOOOoooo CUTE!! If have time or if i remember, will post the photos i took (yes yes.. in the cinema..) up here. But it's too CUTE to resist not taking ma. Haha..

Learn something interesting from this movie-cum-documentary.. It depicts parenthood as a complementary thing. They take turns to look after the baby while they went to look for food. But each have the same goal in mind-to protect the baby till it's time to move on to the next mating season. Was quite cool...

The other thing that impressed me is that God's timing is JUST RIGHT. 'cause the penguins got to travel REAL far to get food. So the female will go 1st then followed by the male. It seem that the timing when the female return is the CORRECT time to take over the child. As the male penguin have not eaten for 4months and they are starving, they would have eaten up their child (i think) or abandon the child in the cold (it's REALLY cold). God is the GREATEST and most brilliant Creator ever! His creations just amazes me time and time again. Thank You God for being my Father!

d+d+d=? ans:D

Man.. Have been slacking too much in sch. Not been doing my readings. Ponning lectures esp the Mon 8am one. Cant wake up. Tried and tried. SIGH~ Mon-Mon blues.. 8am-it's like what???

Well.. MUST catch up! Wanna do well... If possible want an Honours. Like 2nd upper class or better. But.. Is it worth? 'Cause i've DECIDED to stay home to 'babysit' my kids when i have them. Wanna spend time loving and nurturing them man. Don't wanna put them in someone else's hand. It's like it loses that connection. Don't wanna let them be latchkey kids. But like what Pastor Kenny say, no matter how 'perfect' parents may be in nurturing their children, the end product cannot be determined. But my prayer ever since i was Sec 2 is that all my children will come to know and love and serve the living and REAL God. I know i think too far but.... no harm what! Haha..

O.. Everyone reading this please pray for me and probably 'pressure' me. Like r-e-a-l. Hahahaha.. Why d+d+d=D?

'Cause

determination+discipline+diligence=Degree! ;)

Testing... Testing....

He's just SOOOOOO adorable can?? The 2nd cutest guy i know for now. Why 2nd? Zec's the 1st!

Haha... Why for now? Cause he'll grow and other babies are gonna grow up into a toddler. Haha...

Just testing to see how to insert photo into my entries.. YEA!!! YIPEE!! I got it!!! Hahahahahahahahaha..... Took such a LOOOOoooong time can. Hahaha.. I'm a happy happy gal again. Lalalalalala....